Thankful
grate·ful /ˈɡrātfəl/ adjective
feeling or showing an appreciation of kindness; thankful.
thank·ful /ˈTHaNGkfəl/ adjective
pleased and relieved.
Similar: relieved, pleased, glad, grateful
I always thought that I was grateful for everything I had and that I didn’t take things for granted. I used to say to myself after being diagnosed, was I given this disease to teach me something. What did I have to learn? It seems I had to learn a few things including how I feel about myself - inside and out, how I need to let go of those things that don’t serve me and how I live each and every day while I remain thankful for the life I have been given and the one that I fought for.
It’s Thanksgiving this week and while I have been through a lot of ups and downs, I am very thankful for many things. I am thankful for so much more, but here are my top 25!
I am thankful for... MY FAMILY - my amazing, handsome and supportive husband along with my beautiful, sweet and smart daughter.
I am thankful for… MY EXTENDED FAMILY - my parents for giving me my independence and an education, my sister for the many laughs, my Grandparents, Aunts and Uncles for showing me how to care and how to be who you are , my in-laws for their kindness and support and my nieces and nephews for their personalities.
I am thankful for… LAUGHTER - from my husband and daughter. It’s contagious and can truly change my mood. They definitely know how to turn a frown upside down by the sound of their laughter.
I am thankful for… MY HOME - one that my husband and I have made our own over the past 4 years.
I am thankful for… THE SUN - the light it shines and warmth it brings to my body. There was a year that I really had to watch having the sun on my skin which was really tough for me.
I am thankful for… WATER - in all forms. I love water, drinking it (because it doesn’t taste like butter now), swimming in it (oceans, lakes, pools), floating in it, splashing in it , paddling in it and exploring it (scuba or snorkeling).
I am thankful for… PILATES AND YOGA - the strength and mindfulness they have brought me before and after my cancer diagnosis.
I am thankful for… MUSIC - made by instruments and by vocals. I have played the piano since I was little and then I took up the violin. I continue to play my keyboard like I did the piano when I am stressed. (I wish I played more though). I started taking guitar lessons and can’t wait to continue. Singing out loud - mostly while I’m alone - gives me strength. Music is something that I could never live without - when true talent shines through the art of music it gets me excited.
I am thankful for… CLAY/ PLAY DOUGH - the way it allows you to mold what you are feeling and wanting to create. I just came across this company called Pinch Me Dough and want to purchase a container. I love to be creative with art, but it’s also a stress reliever for me too.
I am thankful for… TEA - hot and cold, but mostly hot. I don’t like the smell or taste of coffee so I have chosen tea for my choice of a hot beverage. Caffeine also bothers me so I enjoy mostly caffeine free tea besides a few chai teas here and there. I have found many wonderful brands and flavors that bring warmth and peace to my experience.
I am thankful for… CITIES WITH HISTORY AND CULTURE - the ones I have been to and the many that I can’t wait to travel too. All of the history and adventure they bring give me such joy and excitement. I love to learn about new places and explore new places.
I am thankful for… THE COUNTRYSIDE - acres of land to run around and explore without all of the people. I love venturing outside of the hustle and bustle of city life to where the hills roll and the trees are plentiful. It’s a beautiful way to see nature.
I am thankful for… NATURE HIKES - where I can put on my hiking boots or gym shoes and travel a new path. Growing up my Aunt and Uncle would take us to a few nature preserves on foot and bikes. I wish I did more of it then, but I’m making up for it now.
I am thankful for… CAMPING TENTS - giving nature lovers the experience to really discover places in a new way especially those that are more remote. If I’m thankful for camping tents then I am definitely thankful for huge warm SLEEPING BAGS because if I’m going to be out on a cold night I need to be warm! (I have only been camping twice, but my husband and I are really hoping to have our family do more of it).
I am thankful for… NICE HOTELS - that don’t leave you with bug bites after a night’s sleep. This just recently happened and while I’m very frugal I will now be ok with my husband wanting to stay at nicer hotels!
I am thankful for… JUICES - that are tasty and healthy. I never had a taste for the good fruits and vegetables that help to keep you healthy until 5 or so years ago. I love having a good juice or smoothie to keep my insides clean and help keep my health in check.
I am thankful for… DOCTORS - that take care of us in so many ways. I have had an amazing care team over the past 5 years that I can’t thank enough for getting me to where I am today. I am truly grateful for them. AND if I'm thankful for the doctors then I am absolutely thankful for the NURSES and ADMINISTRATIVE TEAMS that helped me through the struggles and tears.
I am thankful for… BEACHES - that give you sand, seashells and rocks to collect. There’s nothing better than soft white sand beneath your toes.
I am thankful for… ICE - big or small. I enjoy a nice cold beverage with ice in it as well as I love skating across a rink. There is something about a refreshing drink on a hot summer day and then there is something about bundling up for a spin with your skates on.
I am thankful for… BALLS - bouncing, rolling and hanging. It’s something to see my 17 month old throw and kick a ball. This act brings her joy and makes me so proud of what she has learned in the 17 months she has been with us. Balls bring fun and enjoyment to the world - beach ball, sports balls (basket, soccer, foot, wiffle, lacrosse, tennis, paddle, racquet, rugby), pool balls, ski balls and there are even ornaments.
I am thankful for… SHOES - boots, flats, heels and sneakers! I have a collection for my feet that I’m not sorry for having. I wear every pair I have! I know there are many that don’t have shoes to keep their feet from the dangerous elements so I donate my shoes if I haven’t worn them very often.
I am thankful for all GESTATIONAL CARRIERS i.e. Surrogates - especially the one that helped us bring my beautiful daughter into the world since I am not able to carry a pregnancy due to my cancer and the medication I am on for 10 years.
I am thankful for supportive ONE ON ON CONVERSATIONS - I am not someone who thrives in big group settings anymore. Maybe I never really was, but I faked my way through it. I appreciate spending time with my close friends and family members and having special and important conversations. To the friends that have extended there support this year and given me time for one on one conversations, thank you!
I am thankful for MEDICATION (and the advances in research) - the ones that allowed me to fight my cancer, the ones that keep me safe from my cancer and the ones that help me mentally to be stable each day. Many may not believe in vaccinations and taking medication, but I think it’s ok when they are doing their job and that one is not abusing them. I wouldn’t be here today without all the research and production of the medication I am on daily.
I am thankful for… MY LIFE - the one that has many ups and downs, has learned a lot and has made beautiful changes over the 34 years I’ve been alive. I have struggled with anxiety and depression as well as loving myself - I haven’t always been kind to myself and I have blamed myself for so much. I have lost many beautiful people in my life, but I have also met so many amazing souls that I still have in my life. Deep down though I believe that I am an amazing person - a good wife, mom, daughter, niece, granddaughter, godmother and friend. If anyone doesn’t feel that I am, I have to be ok with that. I am truly grateful for the life that I have - I am who I am. I am me. I am thankful! I will never be grateful for my cancer diagnosis, but it did help me change for the better and I guess I’m ok with that.
Wishing you all - your loved ones and friends - a very Happy Thanksgiving! There is so much hate and violence in the world so we have to be thankful for what we have. I know that this time of year can be tough for many as well so if you need anything - support in anyway, please reach out. I am here for you.
Gobble Gobble!
